For almost a year I have been slowly transforming into the person I am meant to be. There have been struggles and there have been good times. Hopes have been dashed and brought to life. People have come and gone and new places have been explored. But the load I carry has been pushing me to the limit. I can't breathe, I can't think, I can't sleep. I lay awake at night and wish things were different. I think about the things I regret and the things I want to come to life.
But through the pain and the suffering of the last year a lot of really GREAT things have happened. I got tired of the person I was because that person is what everybody else wanted me to be. I stopped listening to everybody else and started doing what I wanted. I am finally starting to be the person I want to be. There are still obstacles in my path but they are becoming few and far between. I am starting to be at peace with myself at long last. It has only taken almost 27 years to find that peace but it is starting to happen.
I still have a lot of issues I need to work out but it will happen in the long run. The debt is almost all paid off after this week, I will be left with only two bills and they will paid off this time next year, if not sooner. No more loans or credit cards for me ever again after all this is paid off. All cash from now on. But gas prices are killing me they jumped between $3.79 and $3.85 in a matter of two hours. I filled up Monday for $3.75 and it cost me $62. I need a car and my savings is adding up so it won't be long before I can get a car.
Well I'm unable to word the rest of my thoughts so I'm heading out for now. Maybe tomorrow the rest will be easy to get out correctly. Later!
